Nothing else matters because I feel like I'll never get out of this moment.
Some evenings as I watch the sun set, I think I feel some of the Sun's golden rays seeping through the cracks of my skin. It comes like an injection, shooting me up with the warmth found only in the departing sun. Each stream of light coursing through my veins.
This may sound like a good thing. Maybe even something you long for. But it's not. And you shouldn't. You see at the end of every sunset comes the darkness. And with that paralyzing darkness comes the emptiness of each vein. Every once of light drained from the depths of what I was moments before.
So each day I sit and I wait. Waiting for the sunset that will bring me that hope once again. Like my own necessary drug pulling me away from what I'm most scared of. Each day, praying that today will be the day that the sun is enough to make me feel okay. And maybe one day it will be.